Vespers Goodbye
by amayj
Summary: Nothing comes without a cost." How can you end something that never began? How do you get closure? How do you cope? Angst. One shot.


**Vespers Goodbye**

** Summary: **"Nothing comes without a cost." How can you end something that never began? How do you get closure? How do you cope? Angst. One shot.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Camp Rock, and am not affiliated with any of the owners, creators or producers of any media franchise. All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. No copyright infringement is intended.

Nate used to care about his image, and rumours. But not any more. Circumstances change. Things happen, and it can change your whole life. Now he feels so alone. The cost was far too high. It wasn't worth the cost, but it was still ruthlessly taken from him.  
He didn't start out so alone. He probably wouldn't have got this far on his own.  
He didn't know how to finish. But he knew he had to, or it all would have been for nothing.

He put in the last of the long hours, and it paid off. Now, it was almost finished.

Just one final show. One final song.

_All of you  
Shaped me into what I am  
Carried out the bitter man.  
Do you have a master plan?  
Oh, no. _

The one song he wrote, after.

For that one person who made it all worth it.

_Somewhere, I  
Let all my defenses down.  
Never thought to turn around,  
And you did not make a sound. _

The one person who knew him better than anyone.

_See it turning red  
Like a bullet through the chest.  
Lay me down to rest  
It's a lover's final breath._

He could see his ex-girlfriend, Marie Ray, standing with his parents at the front of the crowd. He knew she wanted to be more than friends, but he didn't. He couldn't handle that.

_And I found out  
Nothing comes without a cost  
And life was just a game we lost.  
Do you have a better thought? _

He told her that he wasn't interested, and she said it was fine, that she would wait until he was ready.  
But nothing would ever change. He would never be ready, never be the same again.

_Now you're gone  
And nothing's ever felt so wrong  
A moment seems to last so long.  
Do you have a fear so strong?_

He saw another familiar face in the audience. Mitchie Torres. She knew all that had happened. The one who sympathised, empathised, but could never understand.

What Nate couldn't understand, is why no one else knew.

_See it turning red  
Like a bullet through the chest.  
Lay me down to rest  
It's a lover's final breath. _

He told the audience that he loved them, and spent a few extra seconds examining the audience, before turning on his heel, leaving the stage and stalked straight into his dressing room, locking the door.

He sat down, putting his face into his hands and bitterly cried. For himself. For her. For everyone who had ever lost a loved one.

Suddenly, he couldn't sit any longer, and began pacing through his room. He yelled out, punching the cabinet. The contents spilled onto the carpet. He sighed, and kneeled to pick it all up. However, something strange caught his eye. He had seen many of these is real life, but never actually touched one. It wasn't his, so he didn't know how it got there.

_Yes_

He picked it up, feeling its deathly coolness on his fingers. His fingers that hadn't felt warmth in so long. He left everything else, stood and picked up a nearby photo, before returning to the seat he was on previously.

That's when there was a knock on the door.

"Nate? Nate are you in there? Let me in," Nate growled at her presence, only wanting to be alone. Soon, he heard another voice.

"Maria? Please move, I really need to speak to Nate, it's urgent,"

_Mitchie?_

_No._

_No more._

There was another knock on the door. But Nate was resolute.

"Nate? Nate please let me in. I need to talk to you about what happened. Why haven't you told anyone? Nate? Nate!" He heard her call out to someone, trying to get the door open. He knew it was all or nothing. Now or never.

He tore a page from his song book, and quickly scrawled four words down. He quickly kissed the page, and the photo of the smiling girl. The girl who was his life, and nobody ever knew.

The girl who he couldn't be with because she wasn't famous.

He felt in the small indents. He knew how it worked, even a small child could figure it out. He just prayed it would work.

So Romeo and Juliet.

One lover dying for the other.

His Vesper.

His love.

All gone.

It was over.

He had seen many movies, he knew where to hold it to ensure his death.

_And now I die  
And kiss your tender lips goodbye...  
Pray to God he hears my cry... _

He put the gun into his mouth, relishing the cold metal against his teeth. The door burst open, as he closed his eyes, thinking of her, and pulled the trigger. The horrified faces watched from the doorway, as the talented young man's lifeless body hit the floor.

* * *

Connect 3 will no longer be making music together. Nate Grey, youngest member and front liner of his own side project, committed suicide last night after his own show.

He was found in his dressing room moments after by close friends, hit singer Mitchie Torres and rumoured beau, Maria Ray, but he was unable to be revived.

The reason for his suicide is still under speculation, but Mitchie believes it had to do with those rumours concerning Maria Ray, when his real lover had died in a car wreck merely weeks before.

Caitlyn Gellar, an aspiring producer, was killed in a car accident exactly one month before the release of 'Who I Am'. She was a childhood friend of the talented singer, and had worked very closely with Nate during the production stages of his album. Mitchie, also a friend of Caitlyn's believed there was something between the two, but the label forbid Nate from making the relationship public until after the release of his album. After this tragic accident, Nate was left trying to pick up the pieces, when the tabloids started new rumours concerning Maria Ray. This all proved to much for the young star, who turned to suicide as a solution.  
Our prayers go out to the grieving friends and family of Nate Grey, and Caitlyn Gellar.

_"Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain." _

**Thoughts? **

**Add me on twitter **.com/amayj

**peace.**

**amay**

*UPDATE* This story was nominated in the Indie Camp Rock Awards! More details are on my profile, but to vote for me, go to

http : / / spreadsheets6 . google . com / viewform ? formkey = dHloc0x EY1 R5Y1 NLZj JoU1 RTa Vpt Q0E 6MQ (remove spaces).

Thank you so much, I love you all!


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